Wednesday, March 9, 2011

Fair weather friends

A fair weather friend is someone who is warm when the friendship benefits them and cold when it does not. This oscillation between hot and cold may not be intentional; the fair weather friend may not even know that they're so fickle and utilitarian. We all know people like this in our circle. And, if we're able to see ourselves clearly, we probably notice that we sometimes behave this way towards others too.

How do we deal with people who treat us like this? Do we avoid them like most self-help gurus would suggest? Are they really 'toxic'? Are we all 'toxic'?  

Jesus was a magnet for fair weather friends. He was very popular when he miraculously healed diseases and fed masses of people, but when persecution came, everyone including his closest friends deserted him. I find it interesting that Jesus was not surprised by this abandonment. He knew all along that his disciples--the very ones he chose--didn't have the wherewithal to stick with him through trouble (Matthew 26:31-25, 41; John 2:24-25).

And yet their failure as friends didn't seem to bother him. Why not? Probably because his life objective was to benefit others to begin with (John 10:10). If we adopt Jesus's objective in our lives, fair weather friends won't bother us so much either.  Who knows, they may even become less fickle--in the end the disciples accepted death rather than betray Jesus... 

No comments:

Post a Comment